What Is YOUR Most Embarrassing Moment?

Every one of us has had at least one terribly embarrassing moment in our lives. I know that I’ve had my share, that’s for sure!

Heck, just yesterday I tripped coming out of my front door with a Superman kite in my hands! My grandson got a new kite and I was excited to show him what an expert kite flyer I am, so I rushed out the door. Somehow I didn’t see the flower planter that is ALWAYS there, tripped on it, and continued to trip forward while attempting to stay upright for at least ten feet. I can only imagine what I looked like..ugh..I shake my head just thinking about it.

A few months ago I wrote a blog post about my top eleven embarrassing moments (the “clean” ones at least), and you can check those out here: https://cookiesandcursewords.com/oh-no-im-falling

Let’s Hear YOUR Stories

Since I know I’m not the only one that has done unforgettably embarrassing things, I put out a request for all of you to share your moments with me (and the world). 🙂  

Remember, these are embarrassing moments. Not all of them will be “G” rated. If you think this might be a problem for you, this might not be the best post for you to read. You’ve been warned! 🙂

Most of the following are posted in the words of the contributor. I may have edited slightly.

Coffee Shop Conversations

Here’s my embarrassing moment, although I’ve had many! Years ago I was in a convenience store drinking coffee with a friend I had met in the store. We drank coffee 2 or three times a week and always had a pleasant conversation. One day this couple came in with their little girl. I had seen them come in before and the little girl was always dressed like a princess, while the parents looked like they were homeless. I commented to my friend about this as the clerk came to our table to refill our coffee. The clerk almost spilled the coffee as my friend and the clerk broke out in laughter. I asked what was so funny? My friend said “That’s my sister!” Embarrassing is an understatement!

“Fun” On A Dirt Road

A few years ago my husband and I used to talk on the phone occasionally and have phone sex when he was working out of town… Once I thought it would be fun to take a” toy” down a dirt road and have phone sex away from home.

The conversation is getting hot and heavy,  I’m down some dirt road and it’s nearly dark out. There’s no traffic anywhere to be found. I decide it’s a perfect time. I wasn’t paying attention for about three or four minutes and when I look up, there are flashing lights in my rearview mirror…and the officer is already walking towards my car! What do I do?  Just as he arrived at my door, I managed to slide my hand over and turn off my “toy” and toss it on the floor  as I was rolling my window down.

I already had my wallet right beside me so I reached over for the cop to hand my ID. He stood there for a few minutes,  never really saying anything but did spend a lot of time staring at me… I had no idea why. Then the officer left to run my ID and I looked over to the passenger side and there was my toy sitting on the edge of the seat!! Bright purple toy…. It never landed on the floor like I thought it did.

That officer probably had some good conversations about this stop, and I’m no longer adventurous!

Tea For Everyone

One time on a trip home from Oklahoma my girlfriend and I stopped and had lunch at Arby’s I couldn’t find the key to her car and she had a spare in her wallet she was looking while in the process of looking for it I was filling up my tea and not paying attention and let my tea over flow all over the place.

Isn’t This How Snapchat Works?

I am technologically challenged, to say the least. I was on Snap Chat and was enjoying it until they kept making changes!! I couldn’t keep up with all the new confusing (to me) changes! Anyway one afternoon after a nice long nap that did a number on my hair. I was sitting on the toilet and got on Snapchat. I was pressing this button, then that button, etc. Soon got frustrated and clicked off. Not too long after I got PMs from my son and another friend asking why I put a pic of myself on the toilet on my Snapchat story!!!!!! UGH! Needless to say, I’m no longer on Snapchat!

Good WHAT Cream??

Years ago I somehow got convinced to host one of those “adult” parties..the kind where they sell lotions,creams, and every adult toy imaginable. One of my hostess gifts was a tube of minty fresh “Good Head” cream.

The tube was huge, with a nice drawing of a male genital on the side. We hosted Thanksgiving that year- I kept it in my bedside table. I was in the kitchen and my mom and grandma were sitting at the table. I don’t know what my 12 year old son was doing in my room, but I heard him yell “mom,what is this”? Then I heard “Good Head”?

I went in, my grandma was holding the tube and my mom was looking over her shoulder horrified. I grabbed it and threw it in my room. So embarrassed!

C’mon Guys, We’re Walking!

Several of us got together at a friend’s house to drink a few beers. We were having a good time and decided it would be fun to go to the playground park across town and swing on the swing sets. Our friend’s husband had only drank a couple of beers (or so he said), so he was our designated driver.

Six of us somehow packed into a little Suzuki jeep and headed to the park. We were swinging and re-living our childhood when the police pulled up. They asked who was driving, “Jim” raised his hand. Apparently it was obvious that we had all been drinking, so they asked him to take a breathalyzer test to assure he was legal to drive. He gladly complied. Nope. He failed the test.

They asked if anybody else was sober enough to drive. Nobody volunteered. I stated that I didn’t know how to drive stick shift. My friend Brenda (I have permission to use her name) stepped up and said “I can drive stick shift”.  

Next thing I know, she was heading over to the breathalyzer. I heard her say something like “I don’t know how to blow” and then the cop yelled “BLOW”!!  From where I was, I couldn’t hear the next words he said.. but Brenda came literally skipping back to the jeep and said in a very happy singsong voice “C’mon Guys, we’re walking”!! She FAILED THE BREATHALYZER!  

We headed out walking the 1-2 miles back to our friend’s home. The police car followed to make sure we made it back “safely”. This irritated Brenda and I, so we cut across a few yards and ended up walking a different route separate from the group. At one point I was extremely thirsty. For some reason, the Catholic Church parsonage had their automatic lawn sprinklers going at midnight. I leaned down to get a drink from the sprinklers, which drenched my entire face and my hair was dripping wet.

When we walked into my friend’s house, they were already there since we took a longer route. Our friend had a shocked looked on her face and asked if we were okay. She thought my hair and face were wet from sweat!

It was a night we’ll never forget, and Brenda asked that I include it as one of her most embarrassing moments!

Doesn’t This Trash Bag Make Me Look Cute?

I was hanging out with my friend in the kitchen laughing. I laughed so hard I peed my pants. I excused myself and went to the bathroom, but could only find a trash bag due to it being an extra bathroom. I tied the trash bag around my waist, pretending that it was also a joke. My friend looked at me with a smirk on her face and said, “you peed your pants didn’t you. ”  At this point I softly said “Yes.” I then left to change my clothes.

A Nice Surprise 

It wasn’t too long after mom had brought the new baby  home from the hospital. Gene (cousin) dropped by to see mom and the baby.  Mom and he were talking and I went to change my baby sister. I grabbed both of her tiny legs in one hand and pulled them back toward her head. Just as I did this ppfftt , she squirted poop right in my face.  If I remember correctly I had a big grin on my face because I was smiling and talking to the baby. Poop went all over my face, in my hair, and I’m sure in my mouth, although I don’t remember that specifically. (Probably traumatic amnesia or something, lol) Anyway, I ran in the bathroom screaming, to the laughter of Gene and Mom,  and stuck my head under the tub faucet. Gene never let me forget it, and for a 14 year old that was pretty embarrassing. From that point on, my sister’s nickname was little shit!

NOTE:  THIS WAS MY SISTER JAN, AND I AM THE LITTLE SHIT! 🙂

You Want Me To WHAT??

The worst human interaction I have ever had just took place last week. I’m eight months pregnant . This man at the convenience store was staring at me and kind of creeping behind me. When I was leaving he ran up to the van and asked how much longer I had.  I told him a little over a month and then he asked me if I was lactating! I was like what? He said “I’ll pay you 50 dollars to check right now”… and I said no. Then he said “I’ve been looking for someone to let me nurse off of them and am willing to pay 300 dollars,  can I give u my number?”. I told him that’s NOT gonna be me dude and then took off. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.  So I did both.

When You Gotta Go….

I REALLY had to go the bathroom during the middle of a movie several years back. I was in a BIG hurry and ran in and shut the door and “went” but hadn’t noticed the urinals.  SO surprised when I came out and saw a man standing at one “going!”

Boy, Do I Have Egg On My Face!!

My sisters and I met 2 cousins from St Louis in Kansas City for a fun weekend. The first morning we were there we were eating the free breakfast at the hotel.  I got my food, sat down, cut my boiled egg, and BAM! The whole thing exploded, flying through the air and landing on the blinds, the table, my sister’s and cousins, and me.  How was I to know you don’t reheat boiled, peeled eggs in the microwave? Anyway, for once I had an immediate retort. I jumped up and announced to the room, “Boy do I ever have egg on my face.”  The next morning I was again eating breakfast and a man came over and said, “I heard you serve eggs.” His wife was with him and she was there the previous morning and told him what happened!

Embarrassing moments are just that…embarrassing.  Sometimes I think back to certain moments in my life and still feel my face getting flushed.  It’s easy to start overthinking about these moments, but I prefer to laugh it off and chalk it up to another life experience.  I hope you enjoyed reading these, and feel free to comment with an embarrassing moment of your own!