My Evening With a Stripper
A bunch of the women in my office were posting on Facebook a few weeks ago that they wanted to get together and have a girl’s night out to see the Chippendales(or some similar group) at a scheduled performance. The show was to be held while I was on vacation, and I’m not really into male strippers…so I just enjoyed watching the posts and plans from the other ladies.
Today I remembered to ask how many actually went, and I was told that it was all just talk- nobody went to the show. Well, dang it! I was looking forward to hearing their stories. Believe it or not, I actually have a stripper story. No, I haven’t recently been to a strip show…but I have been twice in my life. Once was about twelve years ago with a few work friends. It was a Chippendales show, and it was really pretty uneventful. The other time was a bit more exciting, so I’ll tell you all about that one!
The Back Story
In the late 80’s/early 90’s , my friends and I used to frequent a little corner bar and grill in Andover Kansas. Timbuktu was (and still is) the name of this joint. A friend was acquainted with the owners, so this was one of our regular stops.
My memory has definitely faded over the past thirty years, but I can remember two distinct things about Timbuktu.
- They had the best cheeseburgers in the county.
- The owner had an obsession with Neil Diamond.
Yes, Neil Diamond…the “Sweet Caroline”, “Cracklin Rosie” guy! She loved Neil Diamond so much that there was even a big picture of him hanging on the wall of the ladies room. It was just a tiny one seat restroom. Every time we went to take care of our business, we got to stare at something like this..
Ah, the fun we had at ole Timbuktu. I could tell so many stories! Actually I don’t think I could remember too many details these days, because I’m old.. AND many of the memories are pretty alcohol fogged. Hey, I was in my early twenties- what else would you expect? 🙂
I do, however, have one very clear memory of Timbuktu.
The Male Stripper
Someone suggested that Timbuktu hire a male stripper to drum up some extra business. On the night of the scheduled show, the place was packed.. standing room only.
My friends and I arrived early so we could get good seating, and had already slammed down several beers before the performance time.
I Just Needed to Go Pee!
The stripper was late, and management seemed to be getting concerned. I really didn’t care, I was just having a good time drinking with my buddies. I needed to use the restroom so I stumbled my way down the hallway at the back of the building.
After paying my proper respects to Neil Diamond (ha), I opened the door to come out of the restroom. The restroom was located right by the back door to the building. As I exited the restroom, the back door inched open and I heard a voice.
“Hey, can you help me?”, said the voice. I looked all around but nobody else was near me. “Are you talking to ME?”, I replied. “Yes, I could really use some help.”
Because it was thirty years ago and my judgement MAY have been slightly impaired, I opened the door and went out back to talk to the strange voice that needed help.
The Stripper’s Assistant
When I opened the door, I immediately knew who I had been talking to through the crack. This was the stripper. He was tall, very muscular, with long blond “Fabio” type of hair. To some I’m sure he was gorgeous, to me he was a bit creepy. I never did care for Fabio. 🙂
Just in case you’ve never heard of Fabio, here’s a picture of him…
He was very nice and explained that his sound guy didn’t show up. He had a boom box in his hand. He asked me if I could go plug the boom box in and press play on the cassette tape. What was I to say? The stripper needed me to be his sound guy! Ha!
I gave him about two minutes to get ready, plugged the boom box in, and started the stripper music. He came in, did his thing, and the crowd went wild. My friends thought I had known him all along and had this planned. Nope. I just happened to be coming out of the restroom when he needed help.
It’s just another one of those really weird, almost unbelievable things that have happened to me in my life. It’s those little unpredictable moments that make life fun.
Anybody Wanna Get a Cheeseburger?
Timbuktu is still there, on that same corner. I haven’t been there for at least twenty five years. Hmmm..I wonder if they still have great cheeseburgers? Anybody wanna meet me there?
